limerence

/LIM-uh-rens/

noun

Meaning

An intense, often involuntary state of romantic infatuation in which a person becomes preoccupied with someone else and highly sensitive to signs of reciprocation. Limerence may bring euphoria when attention seems mutual and anxiety or despair when it does not; unlike ordinary attraction, it commonly involves intrusive thoughts, idealization, and emotional dependence on the other person's response.[2]

1. Obsessive romantic infatuation marked by persistent thoughts, idealization, and a strong desire to be wanted by a particular person.
2. The euphoric, anxious early phase of falling in love, especially when the relationship's future or the other person's feelings remain uncertain.
3. A one-sided or unrequited attachment that can make small interactions, messages, or perceived signs of interest feel disproportionately meaningful.

Examples

“I thought it was love, but the constant checking was definitely limerence.”

“One like from them and my limerence gets a whole new season.”

“My limerence had me rereading a two-word text for an hour.”

“The crush faded when we dated; apparently the limerence needed the mystery.”

“This playlist is just limerence with a good bass line.”

Origin and spread

Psychologist Dorothy Tennov coined limerence as a name for the experience commonly called being in love. Merriam-Webster records an earliest documented use in 1977 and describes the base limer- as an arbitrary formation followed by the suffix -ence. Tennov developed the concept through interviews and presented it more fully in her 1979 book Love and Limerence. The word later moved beyond psychology into general relationship writing and online discussions about obsessive or one-sided attraction. The spelling variant limerance is also established, though less common.[1][2]

How to use it

Limerence is informal but widely understandable in discussions of relationships, mental health, and online culture. It is more specific than crush or infatuation because it highlights involuntary preoccupation and uncertainty about reciprocation. It is not a formal psychiatric diagnosis, so using it does not by itself identify a disorder. The term can also be used loosely for an intense crush, even though its traditional meaning emphasizes obsessive thoughts and emotional dependence.

Sources

1. Psychology Today — LimerenceSupports: origin.
2. TIME — Sexes: Let's Fall in LimerenceSupports: origin, meaning.