future faking
/FYOO-chər FAY-king/noun · verb
Meaning
Future faking is the use of attractive but empty or knowingly misleading promises about the future to get something from someone now. The promises may involve marriage, moving in together, travel, career opportunities, money, or changed behavior, while the person making them takes little or no meaningful action toward delivering them.[1][2]
- 1. A relationship-manipulation tactic in which someone describes an exciting shared future to keep a partner emotionally invested, forgiving, loyal, or available.
- 2. A broader pattern in which a friend, family member, boss, or business associate promises future rewards or changes to secure present effort, money, patience, or cooperation.
- 3. As a verb, to future-fake means to use this kind of promise-based manipulation: someone can future-fake a partner, employee, friend, or potential collaborator.
Examples
“He keeps future faking about moving in, but won't even pick a date.”
“That promotion talk was future faking, not a real offer.”
“She said we'd travel the world, then used future faking for six months.”
“If every apology comes with a huge future plan, watch for future faking.”
“They used future faking to get free work and disappeared.”
Origin and spread
Future faking is a modern compound built from future and the verb fake, using the idea of presenting an imagined future as if it were genuine. The expression is documented in modern English-language relationship and psychology writing, including a Psych Central article dated September 16, 2019. Later writing broadened the term beyond romantic relationships to workplaces, friendships, family relationships, and business settings. The available record does not establish a single confirmed coiner, and the term is used in popular relationship discourse rather than as a formal clinical diagnosis.
How to use it
The term is informal and usually critical. It implies a repeated or strategic mismatch between promises and actions, not merely a plan that changed, an unrealistic goal, or an ordinary broken promise. Although online discussions often associate future faking with narcissism, the label should describe a behavior pattern rather than diagnose the person using it.
Sources
- 1. Psych Central — How Narcissists Use Future Faking to Manipulate YouSupports: meaning, earliest documented use, form.
- 2. Psychology Today — How Future Faking Can Be Used to Manipulate YouSupports: meaning.
- 3. The Knot — What Is Future Faking? What to Look Out For & How to Respond
- 4. The Narcissistic Personality — Narcissists & The Art of Future-Faking
